Christmas 2008

Jacob, when you grow up, you will probably remember that Herman and Bonnie lived with her dad for awhile. You'll remember that you came to visit, and that you and Herman had grand days while fishing, catching minnows, and just mucking around the creek while doing whatever felt good.

You may or may not remember that you used to come to our other house every Thursday from the time you were born till you were three years old. All of that happened before we moved in with my dad to take care of him. You loved playing with Herman every Thursday when you and your Mom and MaMaw came over for dinner. You looked forward to all the things the two of you did together. Every birthday, every season, and every holiday brought something fun to do. Much of it has been recorded on this site.

One of our biggest concerns when we moved away from our house was the possibility that you could forget us, but that didn't happen. I'm not sure if Herman could have withstood the loss if you had forgotten him. Instead of forgetting him, a page was turned and a whole new chapter in your relationship began. I don't think you'll ever forget fishing in the creek that I grew up on, or the days of hanging out with your buddy, Herman, or the swing he made for you by throwing a rope over a giant cedar tree in our front yard. You didn't like it when we moved from our other house, but you soon found that there were fun things to do at this new place.

Thursday was Christmas. We went up to our old house on Friday and your mom and ma maw brought you over to visit with us. We had our own little celebration the day after Christmas, and you got to play with our granddaughter, Ava, and you got to meet Shay.

You and Ava chased each other around and around. I don't know how the two of you had the energy, but you both proved to be tireless. The two of you rode on Brandon's back. You wrestled together and you were uncharacteristically gentle, never using your full strength with Ava. You and Herman picked apart Owl shit or regurgitation (i'm not sure which) with tweezers, looking for the bones of small animals, and you found them. We were assured by your mom that it was quite educational, but I noticed that she wouldn't go anywhere near it. She left that up to Herman. You seemed quite interested in it. Of course, Herman is interested in whatever you're interested in, so he enjoyed pulling the poop (it really looked like poop) apart for you.

It was a great night. As they say, fun was had by all. You are a wonderful part of our life, Jacob. You hold a unique place in our hearts, and that will never change.

Merry Christmas, Jacob.

P.S. Take note of the expression on your mother's face when she is looking at the owl shit. I don't think she would make a very good nurse. Just sayin'.

Friends

A Wild Ride On Brandon's Back

Ava copied everything you did or said because you're a big kid.

Wrestling, there was a lot of wrestling!



You had hugs for Shay!

You were big enough to lift Ava off the floor!

MaMaw and Shay have a moment!

You showed us your muscles!

Singlehandedly bringing back disco!

Enough Said!

And there you all are, looking for bones in the owl yuck.

Ava, Madina, Shay, Brandon

A Rose Between Two Thorns

More horseback riding.

Ava and Jacob playing

Mom and Ava in a quiet moment.

Jacob, Ava, Herman and Mom looking at Owl Yuck!

MaMaw and Shay

Jacob Turns Four

I can hardly believe it. Jacob turns four today. The years have passed so fast; it takes my breath away. Happy birthday, Jacob. We love you.

.

A wish for Jacob

.
blue skies on which to sail

enough space in which to fail

a million stars to light your path

arms to hold you in the aftermath

.
sunshine to brighten your day

a love for work and a lust for play

wisdom to recognize wrong when all others say right

courage to do right when all others choose might

.

strength to go out on your own

memories to bring you back home

the deep kind of love that sustains

a song in your heart with a soulful refrain

Jacob ~ Holding His Place

Photo by Patsy, Jacob's MaMaw. Herman will cry when he sees this.

We Miss You, Jacob!

Even though we don't see you, Jacob, we are thinking of you.

These are some Christmas photos that Patsy sent to me.

Jacob and Bek! (Notice those beautiful hardwood floors.)

Who is that hiding there in the background, in the red and white checked pajamas. Is that MaMaw? I bet she's holding a cup of coffee. I would recognize that familiar coffee clutch anywhere!

Could that be dinosaurs? (Can you believe all those dinosaurs all over Bek's beautiful hardwood floors? I hope they don't leave any droppings.)

Cheese!

Look, Santa left a big boy bike, and I can ride it all over Mom's beautiful hardwood floors.

Would love to stay but I have a train to catch.........And a Merry Christmas was had by all.....

The Visit

Patsy, Jacob and Bek arrived a little after noon. It was so great to see them. Jacob loves where we live. There is so much for a boy to do here. Herman and Jacob walked down to the creek. They went fishing and caught a lot of things.....they weren't fish though. They found a toy truck, and two balls and fished them out of the creek.

Jacob climbed up on my father's red tractor.
He really enjoyed my brother's boat.

Pretend fishing turned out to be more fun than the actual fishing.

A very special candy cane...

Isn't she lovely?

"You don't look like my mama."

Pretty Woman!

Hot Babe!

The Alligator/Dinosaur Monster...

Jacob was an Alligator/Dinosaur for Halloween this year. Boo!

One of a kind soup...

I have a friend. We've been friends since we were 19; that's 37 years, but who's counting? Herman and I wouldn't be married if I hadn't met her first. She set us up on a blind date.

Over the years we have helped each other through many rough patches. We've shared sorrows about our kids, husbands, losing our parents, divorces and on and on. We've attended weddings, funerals, graduations, birthday parties and exercise classes together. We've gone on more diets and self improvement programs than I care to remember. We've rocked and diapered each others babies, and scolded each others children. We've gotten pedicures, gone apple picking, taken our kids trick or treating together, and bided our time in hospital waiting rooms, waiting with bated breath for children and grandchildren to come into the world. Once we were even loaves of Wonder Bread together. We have called each other in the middle of the night to share our fears and joys. We have cheered each other on and cried for one another.

You don't make a friend like this over night. It takes years of simmering and slow cooking, with many additions over the years, until you have a soup that has layers and layers of subtle flavors. It is a soup that will comfort your soul, sustain your will to go on, and warm your heart when the cruel world has turned it cold. The aroma is so unique that it can never be duplicated by anyone else. Eventually the stew is so complex that even the chefs themselves no longer remember all the ingredients that made it what it has become. They could never give anyone else the recipe. It's a very rare thing, indeed, and everyone has to make their very own.

Most of the time during our lives, through some miracle, we have managed to only have one crisis at a time. She has one and then I have one. We have always had the time to devote to the other's crisis. This is not the case now. We are both going through a very difficult time. Life is hard for each of us right now. We will live through it and come out the other side, but life is more difficult now because we are not able to give each other the full time support that we usually do. We give each other a quick call or send an email, and then each of us goes about our day with the knowledge that we are in the thoughts of the other. That is the best we can do for each other right now.

Still, I know she's there and she knows I'm here.

Better days will come again.

Until then, I'm thinking of you.

As for anyone else who reads this today, I wish for you a soup with an aroma as sweet as mine.